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Humour

Gerard Hoffnung

Cartoonist, musician, and speaker. His 1958 speech to the Oxford Union includes the following items.

The Bricklayer

"Half way up, I met the barrel coming down..."

The story of successive changes in the relative weights of a hapless bricklayer and a barrel full of bricks, a block and tackle system, and the resulting events.

Hotels in the Dolomites

"There is a French widow in every room, affording delightful prospects."

Letters written by Tyrolean hoteliers in response to requests for accomodation.

Bob Newhart

Comedian and comedy actor, best known for his monologues in which he presents one side of a conversation.

The Driving Instructor

"60 miles per hour... in reverse... in your driveway."

A driving instructor encounters the worst pupil in the world.

The Voyage of the Codfish

"Our missile attack on Miami Beach is best described as 'ill timed'"

The most incompetent submarine crew in the U S Navy return from their round the world voyage... but before they go ashore, the Captain just wants to say a few words.

John Cleese

Fawlty Towers

Basil Fawlty - rude, bad-tempered, sarcastic, and an inveterate snob. Running a seaside hotel is obviously his true vocation.

"Would you care for a rat?"
Isn't it just his luck that there's a rodent on the loose when a hotel inspector calls?

"Don't mention the War"

A party of Germans visits the hotel. Basil's prepared to let bygones be bygones - after all, it was a long time ago. One fire alarm, a moose who's learning English, and a nasty bout of concussion all conspire to make things turn out very differently indeed.